Love is the glue that holds us all together
There was a line in Christopher Nolan’s Interstellar, “Love is the one thing we are capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space.” Love is not something that is invented, it exists. It is observed and captures us. Love is the glue that holds us all together. It is the core emotion which binds any selfless relationship. This is the feeling not just reserved for people, but for anything abstract. Love exists for career, hobbies, souvenir, places and memories. Shiv Raj, a resident of Ranchi says, “In relationships too love is the primary force. It acts like a connective tissue throughout our whole lives.”
The importance of friendship in relationships
Friends are like the family you choose. Studies have shown that friendships are the most important relationships we have in terms of our health and happiness. Cultivating them into old age could even help us live longer. People who put time and effort into nurturing friendships over the years are happier and healthier. People’s friendships appear to have had a strong effect on their well-being. When people have stressful friendships, they have a risk of illness. When things are well they are generally thriving.
The rawness of friendships
Unlike familial bonds, which often come with responsibilities and expectations, friendships are only based on joy. When we select our friends we look for those who share similar qualities and interests. We find people to whom we can reveal our actual selves without fear of judgement or rejection. Unlike relationships there is no obligation to stay. We do so because sharing triumphs and dramas makes life lighter and comfortable. Friendships are more important than any other connection we have.
Spotting toxic friendships and relationships
Your friends are really important to you, but sometimes friendships can be toxic. A toxic friend may do things like make you feel bad, try to control you, or demand most of your attention. They will also complain and act jealous. Constant criticism can be very painful. Your friends should support you, not pull you down. Aditi Sharma adds, “A toxic friend usually doesn’t want you to feel good because they aren’t happy with themselves. However, a toxic friend wants to feel better than you and will be jealous of your success.”
By definition, a toxic relationship is a relationship marked by behaviours that are emotionally and physically damaging. A toxic relationship damages self-esteem and drains energy. A healthy relationship is a safe relationship, a relationship where we can be ourselves without fear, a place where we feel comfortable and secure. A toxic relationship is not a safe place. It is characterized by insecurity, self-centeredness, dominance, control.
Loyalty to people who have left us
Death is natural but we have attachments that are painful to get over. People suggest that we move on. They forget that it is not so simple. We will never get over our loss in any easy way. We won’t ever forget or easily recover. Our grief is the price we pay for having loved. One day, very far from now, the memory of what has happened will still make us tremble. We won’t ever be able to put it behind us. Death is not something we should ever rightly want to overcome. Neha Singh says, “Love in this way is eternal. Mourning does not end. It just fades. We do not know what to do with this loss so we suffer.”