When you are in a healthy relationship things are usually easy going. There may be bumps in the road, as it happens in a normal relationship. But you make decisions together, discuss any problems that may come up, and really enjoy being with each other. Toxic relationships are a different story. If you constantly feel exhausted or unhappy after spending time with your partner, you may be in one. Here are 10 tips on how to recognize a toxic relationship.
If you are in a toxic relationship, you may recognize some of these signs in yourself or your partner.
No support from your partner
In times of need you may run to other people. If your partner is not supportive of your life or career choices, you need to think. There might be a lack of a positive environment and you doubt yourself constantly. Your partner may make you feel insecure about any decision that you make. “Healthy relationships are made from a mutual desire to see the other succeed in all areas of life,” says Ashutosh Mishra. It is not a competition if you really love someone.
Mistreatment of your partner
It is a toxic relationship if your conversations are filled with sarcasm, criticism, or overt hostility. You may even start avoiding talking to each other. A loving relationship is built from kindness and care. You do not deserve to be mistreated at all. Words of kindness always make a bad situation into a healthy discussion.
A jealous partner
Jealousy is a human feeling. It happens to everyone. But if that same jealousy threatens you from working or wearing certain kinds of clothes, it may be toxic. If your partner fails to give you your space it is time to get out of it.
A controlling partner
Questioning where you are all the time or getting upset when you don’t immediately answer texts are both signs of controlling behaviour. They can contribute to toxicity in a relationship. If they interfere in everything you do and try to explain to you your work, you need to get out. In some cases, these attempts of control over you can be a sign of abuse.
If you repeatedly lie to your partner to avoid meeting them, that could be a toxic trait. Pinaki Singh says, “If I had to lie to my partner about my whereabouts, I think that would be a problem. Love is all about transparency. It takes a lot of effort but also feels so easy to be with someone. You do not have to lie at all if you love someone.” Dishonesty breaks a relationship bit by it.
Disrespect is not only about shouting or fighting. It may also be always being late to an event or casually forgetting things that you care about. Sometimes your partner may not even apologize for making you feel bad. These habits can become regular. This goes on to build up a very toxic relationship.
A normal amount of tension runs through every relationship, but finding yourself constantly on edge is an indicator that something’s wrong. Mrs Rashmi Singh is a counsellor. “This constant stress can take a toll on your physical and emotional health.” She says. It can be difficult to calm down and be at ease.
Ignorance of your needs
When you overly commit to your partner and agree with everything they say, there might be an issue. Devoting yourself completely and in the process giving no time for self-care is toxic. “You have to create a space for yourself. Having boundaries in a relationship is essential.” Says Mrs Singh.
You’ve stopped spending time with friends and family. A reason could be to avoid conflict with your partner or to get around having to explain what’s happening in your relationship. You might also find your free time is wrapped up in dealing with your partner. A normal relationship has space for everyone that is essential in your life.
Lack of self-care
“In a toxic relationship, you might ignore your usual habits. You might let go of hobbies you once loved, neglect your health, and sacrifice your free time,” explains Ashutosh Mishra. You deserve to take care of yourself. The only person that is going to love you the most is you.